Allura Finds Out Bloopers

by Phoenix

Ok, I hope this will cheer some of y'all up. I think some may still be doing midterms. Anyway, this is based off of Taryn's story 'Allura Finds Out' (which ya can find on her website - if it doesn't disappear again). I originally wrote this to try and cheer her up and for some reason she wanted me to post this. *shrugs*

Y'all probably want to read her story first before y'all read this. I still highly recommend it cause it is an excellent story. It was the first Voltron yaoi I read and is STILL one of my absolute faves!! Great job girl!!!

Lance: Are we through kissing up now?

*glares* Boy, are ya going to get it!!!


Allura Finds Out - Bloopers

By Phoenix (with permission from Taryn of course ~_^)

Rating: Silly!! (Y'all have been warned.)


Chapter 1


Scene 1: Keith is staring out the window at Pidge and Hunk swimming in the lake.

Keith: Wait, aren't there suppose to be kids down there too? *blinks* ..............

He quickly pulls out some beer and popcorn from thin air and sits back in front of the window.

Director: Cut! Keith, what are you doing?

Keith: HUSH!! I am trying to enjoy the show.

Director: ...........*walks to the window and sees Pidge and Hunk 'humping' instead of swimming* ........... *blinks* ...............

Allura: *runs up* HEY!! I can't see! *shoves director out of the way* Can I have a beer Keith?

Keith: Sure! *hands Allura a beer and they go back to watching the performance*

Scene 2: Keith is trying to get Lance's attention in the rec room. Keith makes his eyes as huge and sad as possible before turning to look at Lance.

Keith: *turns to find Lance gone* Huh? Where did he ........

Lance pops up in front of Keith, shoves him against the window, and kisses him savagely.

Director: Cut!! You were NOT suppose to do that!

Lance: *releases Keith* But I am such a sucker for puppy dog eyes!

Keith slides to the floor, gasping for breath.

Scene 3: Keith is trying to get Lance's attention in the rec room.

Keith, fed up trying to get Lance's attention, flops down on the floor and turns on the TV full blast. A VERY graphic homosexual movie showing lovers in interesting positions comes on.

Keith: O.O ............... *glances at Lance*

Lance's eyes are huge and a quickly increasing pool of drool forms on the floor.

Keith: I see THAT got your attention.

Scene 4: Allura walks into the rec room while Keith and Lance are getting into it.

Allura: O.O *ducks behind a chair to watch*

Director: *whispering* Allura! You are not suppose to stay.

Allura: What? And miss the good stuff? *resumes watching*

Scene 5: Allura is hiding in the shadows, as Lance and Keith walk down the hallway.

Keith: No, right here's closer. *pulls Lance closer*

Allura: Will you two hurry up and get nekkid!! I am wasting film here!

Keith and Lance sweat drop before falling to the ground, their legs twitching in the air.

Director: *rubs eyes* We are NEVER going to get through this scene! *mumbles* Taryn doesn't pay me enough for this!

Scene 6: While the two are relaxing, Keith is trying to tell Lance how he feels.

Lance: *angry* Then, what am I, Keith? Just a body you use to relieve the tension when it becomes too much?

Pidge: *walks in* What are YOU doing in here, Lance?

Lance: *glares* This is 'Allura Finds Out', NOT 'TCR'!!

Pidge: *sheepish grin* Oops! Wrong fic! He he he. I guess I will go find Hunk.

Keith repeatedly bangs his head against the wall.

Scene 7: Keith tries to tell Lance his feelings, again.

Lance: *angry* Then, what am I, Keith? Just a body you use to relieve the tension when it becomes too much?

Sven: *runs in* Well, if you don't want him, I will take him! *grabs Keith and kisses him possessively*

Lance: *pulls Sven off of Keith* What in the HELL do you think YOU are doing?!?!?

Sven and Lance argue fiercely while Keith gasps for breath.

Director: *moans and rubs his forehead* We haven't even finished the first chapter yet!! Anyone have some aspirin?

Scene 8: Allura's room.

Director: Ok Allura, in this scene you are still upset and toying with your food. You do not eat it.

Allura: *looks at food* Thank the Goddess, I don't have to eat this crap. One could peel paint with this.

Nanny: *yells from backstage* HEY!! I COOKED THAT!!

Allura: *blinks* I stand corrected. This crap would eat a hole in the wall.


Chapter 2


Scene 1: Keith and Allura are talking about Keith's meeting.

Keith: I'm sorry, but it'll have to wait. The high council just called me back to Earth for another round of meetings.

Allura looks shocked, staring wide-eyed at Keith's shoulder.

Keith: *blinks* What? *turns to look at view screen* O.O ............

The view screen shows several men stripping while dancing to erotic music.

Keith: *blinks and sweat drops* Uhm, I think we are on the wrong frequency.

Scene 2: Keith and Lance are talking in Keith's room.

Lance: Just hurry back, okay? Otherwise, you'd be amazed the things that start to look good. The maids.......the guards......Coran.....

Coran: *pops head through doorway* When and where?

Keith and Lance sweat drop before falling to the floor twitching.

Scene 3: Lance steps aside to allow Allura to inter his room.

Lance: You just startled me, that's all.

Allura: *walks over to the desk and picks up the book* Have you gotten to Chapter 7? There is a really juicy scene.....*glances at Lance* What?

Lance: O.O

Director: Cut! Allura, that was not your line.

Allura: *sheepish grin* Oops! I didn't know the cameras were rolling.

Lance: *groans* Do I have to fall out of the chair again?

Scene 4: Lance and Allura are talking in Lance's room.

Allura: I'm pretty sure he feels the same way about me.

Lance: *ROFL*

Allura: *glares* WHAT?

Lance: *gasping for air* Keith!! Interested in YOU!! *goes into another laughing fit*

Allura: -_- *proceeds to beat Lance to a pulp*

Pidge: *walks over to Hunk* Lance put his foot in his mouth again?

Hunk: YUP!

Scene 5: Lance (make-up did a wonderful job covering his bruises) and Allura talking, again.

Allura: Isn't that what the books always recommend?

Lance: No, I think that's a very bad idea, Allura. Sex and love aren't synonymous ............. Who the HELL came up with THAT?!?!

Scene 6: Lance and Allura still talking.

Allura: You will allow me one night, Lance.

Lance: No, I won't.

Allura: Yes, you will. *removes 'tape recorder' from under her sleeve* If you don't, I'll .....*blinks* Oops! This is another one of my Amphrosian maid's books. Sorry.

Lance: Can I read it?

Scene 7: Lance is pacing in his room.

Lance: That means that I don't have to let him go without a fight. *loses his temper and throws the book*

Pidge: *yells from backstage* HEY!! WATCH WHERE YOU THROW THAT!!

Lance: OOPS!! Sorry.

Director: *sighs* Cut. How many chapters are left?


Chapter 3


Scene 1: Team discussing the signals from Delta Quadrant.

Lance: Do you ever not think with your stomach?

Hunk: Sometimes. *winks* But only during weasel sex.

Director: NO!! You weren't suppose to say that!

Hunk: *whines* But it is true!

Scene 2: Keith is reading the note from Lance.

Keith: *reading to himself* Kemani, Dach ni estavo bien'e, allyi te valli. - L P.S. I want to fuck you into next Tuesday.

Keith: O.O *turns bright red* ..........

Scene 3: Keith and Allura are talking in the hallway.

Allura: I wanted to talk to you.

Keith: What about?

Allura: It's kind of personal. *glances around* Have you seen my Amprosian maid's book? I can't find it.

Keith: *sweat drops*

Scene 4: Coran and Keith are talking.

Coran: Just talk to them both as soon as you can.

Keith: I will.

Coran: *whispers* Do you think you could put in a good word of me to Hunk?

Keith: O.O ........ Uhm........

Scene 5: Allura is dancing around in her room.

Allura: *trips over a footstool and crashes into a woman backstage* Oops! Sorry.

Kelly: *evil grin* I don't mind.

Allura: *face lights up* I should hope not! *wraps arms around Kelly's neck and kisses her aggressively*

Lance: *pops up with a camera* Finally!! I can get some dirt on them!!

Director moans and empties his flask of whiskey.

Scene 6: Allura and Keith are talking in Keith's room.

Allura: Come on, Keith, I mean -

Keith: *eyes blazing* You mean what?

Allura: *burst into laughter* I am sorry......You funny....when you......are......mad!! *ROFL*

Keith: *blinks* .............. That is SO not good!


Chapter 4


Scene 1: Lance and Hunk are talking in space.

Lance: *thinking to himself* I feel like I'd stumbled through a rabbit hole into another world. What was that old show called ....... 'Twilight Zone'?

Hunk: Wasn't it 'Alice in Wonderland'?

Lance: Hey, I just think these lines, I don't write em.

Scene 2: Hunk and Lance are talking to Pidge and Coran.

Hunk: Anyway, I'll be in the kitchen if anyone needs me.

Pidge: *evil grin* Want me to meet you there?

Hunk: *huge grin* SURE!!

Coran: Can I come?

Hunk: The more the merrier.

Lance: O.O

Scene 3: Lance knocks on Keith's door.

Sven: *opens door* What? You are not Keith.

Lance: *glares* Phoenix hasn't finished THAT fic yet!!

Scene 4: Lance crying in Keith's arms.

Lance: I love you.

Keith: I love you too, but lay off on the onions. Whew!

Scene 5: Keith and Lance in bed.

Keith: *shakes Lance awake* Morning.

Lance: *waves hand in front of face* Ewww. Morning breath.

Scene 6: Team discussing their problem.

Coran: That was uncalled for and beneath a woman of your station, your highness.

Allura: Can't I say at least ONE cuss word?

Scene 7: Team discussing their problem, again.

Keith: If you feel that working together at this point will be impossible, then I'll resign as captain of the Voltron Force and leave planet Arus.

Allura: *turns to Lance* What about you?

Lance: Do you really even need to ask? If he leaves, I'm going with him.

Allura: He is that good in bed?

Scene 8: Team still discussing their problem.

Coran: Can you agree to live by those terms?

Keith: Of course we can.

Coran: *turns to Pidge and Hunk* Do either of you ......... O.O

Pidge and Hunk are aggressively making out on the other side of the table.

Allura: *smirks* I think they are kinda busy at the moment.

Director: *sobbing uncontrollably* Why me? What have I done to deserve this?

Scene 9: Lance and Keith are talking in Keith's room.

Lance: Besides, rules are made to be followed.

Keith: *blinks and faints*

Lance: *sweat drops* Uhm, Keith?

Scene 10: Lance and Keith are talking in Keith's room. WHY?!?!

Keith: What did that note you left me mean?

Lance: *wicked grin* How about I show you the meaning of the SECOND part first?

Use your OWN imagination here.

owari (for now ~_^)

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